For Rita Ball, there is nothing more profound than holding someone’s hand as they draw their final breath. For the past three years, Ball has worked as a trained "death doula" in London, acting as a non-medical end-of-life companion. Her role involves supporting families and volunteering in care homes for the NHS. She observes that families often struggle with the etiquette of dying, frequently asking what they are "allowed" to do. When she reassures them that it is acceptable to kiss, hold, or play music for their dying loved ones, the sense of relief is palpable.
While birth doulas have long been a fixture in maternity care, death doulas—also known as soul midwives—have seen a significant rise in popularity over the last decade. Emma Clare, Chief Executive of End of Life Doula UK, reported a substantial surge in interest, with 114 new doulas joining the organization in 2025 alone. This trend is gaining cultural traction, with celebrities like Nicole Kidman and Ruby Wax undergoing training for the role. In the UK, the services of a doula can cost between £25 and £45 per hour, although many provide their support as volunteers.
The practical impact of this support is illustrated by the story of Fanny Behrens, who sought the help of doula Sarah Parker months before her husband passed away from cancer. Behrens described the experience as incredible, noting that having someone outside the immediate family to talk to allowed her to process her grief without the burden of managing others` emotions. Parker assisted with "death admin," such as contacting undertakers and registering the death, and encouraged the couple to discuss difficult questions regarding burial preferences and funeral arrangements.
Beyond administrative help, death doulas aim to demystify the physical process of dying. Experts argue that modern society has lost its familiarity with "ordinary death," often basing its understanding on dramatic cinematic portrayals. Doulas explain the nuances of the body shutting down, including temperature changes and the "death rattle"—a sound of hard breathing that can be frightening to the uninitiated. By normalizing these symptoms, they allow families to spend the final hours in meaningful connection rather than fear. Soul midwife Krista Hughes emphasizes that just as a child is born into loving hands, people should be able to die into loving hands.
Despite the growing demand, the profession remains largely unregulated in the UK. Marian Krawczyk, a researcher at the University of Glasgow, points out that while doulas fill significant gaps in palliative care, the lack of mandatory training raises concerns about potential opportunism among vulnerable populations. However, she notes that as lifestyles change and people live longer with limiting diseases, the desire to "craft" one’s own dying experience has increased. In a healthcare system that is often difficult to navigate, these companions are becoming an essential resource for those seeking a more compassionate transition from life to death.
